This I Believe

My son Carlo with CA State Attorney General Xavier Becerra

The most exciting part of everything we have all collectively been suffering through is to see how so many are now activated. I see so many speak out. I see youth rising up and using their power. I see people defending each other and speaking out to be kind and tolerant. 

It is heartening to see that these uncomfortable conversations are being discussed. Only when we all agree that there is a problem - only when we recognize and name the problem -- can we then address it, accept it, and thus deal with it - make amends and grow from it.

I am so very proud of each and everyone of you not fearing strong reactions but instead speaking out of your own conviction for the many people who cannot speak for themselves or to just add to their voices. It is beautiful. 

At the darkest hour comes the light and I believe that we, as a nation, are coming to terms to many harmful truths of the foundations of our society and how we have lost our way in affirming to be the greatest most equal most democratic country in the world. 

Growing up - my community was not politically or socially active - at all. Indio and Thermal and Coachella were considered such young cities and such a new society that consistently changed demographics as farmworkers changed faces. But now - so many of us are born and raised in the Coachella Valley - most of us children of immigrants or immigrants ourselves - college educated and back at home ready to do the work. Change is finally coming because we are the ones we have been waiting for and even though now I feel like an elder - as if I have done a lot of work and I am so excited to see the youth be more effective and take our community farther than my generation -- I know we are in good hands. I am a hopeless optimistic even though I have been beaten up these last seven months because of my activism and speaking out against abuse and power -- I believe in all of you and I love to see so many youth and adults interested in city budgets and policies and are now holding their elected accountable.

We are living through exciting times. We will reconcile as a nation, we are growing through growing pains, and we are facing harsh truths. But we have more in common that not - and speaking up and showing up and being kind and tolerant -- we will all make it through.

I pray for all those being affected by Covid-19 and wish no one else be devastated by this virus. We shall overcome and come together, more unified than ever. This I believe.

My Second Rebellion at 40 *upcoming

My 40th year I rebelled again. In the most dramatic way. I fight against all the oppressors I saw in my local world - the police, my drug and alcohol relapsing sister, the local government and local politicians. I rebelled aunts corporate America and the capitalist system that was devouring us all.

Stay tuned to Evolving Yina

My 40th year where I ran for Congress, was arrested, dominated local Coachella Valley Social Media lenses, and where I became pregnant again with a baby boy 20 years after my first rebellion with the same outcome.

My second coming - What I’ve learned at 40

Part 1

I’ve learned...

Dogmas and Doctrines color your life because they are your lens and receptors and parameters of analysis and understanding of the world.

It’s taken me 20 years to learn another way of seeing the world from the foundations  of my first 20 years.

I followed all the rules and excelled from age 5- 19. I was it. I taught myself to read and was a mathematical wiz at a young age. I won so many academic, social, and physical achievement awards. I was accepted to every college I applied to. The world was mine and I was “spiritually pure” según - a devout Jehovah Witness - the religion I inherited from my late father and the way I honored him in life. It served to guide me and my relationship with Jehovah and the congregation provided the fatherly and family love and unity I lacked. My first 2 years at UC Berkeley, I was an oxymoron that was becoming politically aware and politically active while I was supposed to be “no part of this world” undergoing the strict rituals of becoming baptized formally as a Jehovah’s Witness - a journey that takes years for many.

I was finally baptized May 1999 in Mountain View California at 19 years old and then went to a month long study abroad program in Cuba where I met so many in clandestine  Jehovah Witnesses.  I came  back to California to the news that JFK Jr and his pregnant newly wed wife disappeared over the Atlantic.

—-> being home and seeing the difficult patterns my family was in and the somber late summer-  I fell into a depression. I took my Fall 1999 semester off and dealt with suicidal tendencies of a family member - until I finally rebelled against it all. I wanted to escape my reality and now 20, I went to Cuba on a medicine mission before my semester abroad in Brazil. That three day trip to Cuba in 12/27/99 turned into a 10 day escapade where I rang in the new year with a hurricane love. I fell for a smooth-talking caramel skinned emerald eyed Cuban heart hustler - and I was never so happy in my life before - never having been in love. The whole world was so exciting exploring all of La Habana until daybreak and he was lucky to have been given money from some tourists that he splurged on me. I saw my whole life in a simple hut on a Cuban shore where he cooked me the most delicious food and I was loved and marveled at and praised all day.

It was a Beautiful Fairy Tale Fantasy that was fueled by Hollywood Movies like Chayanne’s and Vanessa Williams’ ‘Dance with Me’ and my fascination with Cuba due to my studies at UC Berkeley and my curiosity of the Caribbean Latin Lover.

My devotion to this man was unbecoming throughout the years but my life next to the lovechild of this relationship - my 19 year old son Carlo- has been God’s greatest gift to me. It has been my son that has saved me these last 20 years from so much disenchantment throughout my awakening of the falseness of this world.

La Cuarentona- My second coming of age - 40

Arcata, Ca 4:01 am 5/15/20 Etapas

20 años engañada

 40 años vi la vida tal como es

 Furia...
 Fuego llamas encendidas
Entro de nuevo ...
 Circunstancias similares
 —-> En el año 2000 Embarazada
 ——> En el años 2020 Embarazada
 Que camino, que Visión
 Como quiero guiar esta nueva etapa
 ~~~~ OJOS ABIERTOS ~~~~~~
 Después de tanta tradición y desengaño
 ******* ahora puedo verlo todo ********
 La inocencia y orgullo y creencias infantiles de cuentos de hadas
 Ahora que puedo ver más allá
 Gracias a mis cuarenta años
 Y experiencia y conocimientos y vidas que entrado
 Tan agrande La Vida y tan pequeña la vemos.
 El mundo es chico y tu mente es todo un universo...